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The United States of America

Last Updated by Jim Johnson on


Born: July 4, 1776
Died: November 8, 2016

The United States of America succumbed to multiple causes on Tuesday, November 8, 2016. The nation was pronounced dead around 11:35pm EST. Officials have scheduled an autopsy but no date has been determined for the release of said results. Preliminary indications suggest the cause of death (COA) to be from massive stupidity. Further information will be provided as it becomes available.

If the above is taken by some to be disrespectful, so be it. Following the election last Tuesday, it is very difficult to respect what the United States of America has done to itself. As early statements and reactions from around the world suggest, there is little, if anything, to be proud of.

The United States has just elected without question:

  1. The single most unqualified individual to ever hold the office of president (Donald J. Trump makes Herbert Hoover and George W. Bush look like Stephen Hawking).
  2. An individual who forces sentient beings to redefine the terms crass, classless, boorish, and I do not hesitate to use the term, moronic.
  3. An individual who is at present both the president-elect and viewed by half of the electorate as promoting racist, xenophobic, islamophobic, and misogynistic views.
  4. Someone who already is abandoning his base, retracting his bombastic statements made during the primary and general elections.
  5. An individual who last Thursday, while meeting with President Obama and Speaker of the House Paul Ryan, looked frightened, clueless and very, very afraid (as we all should be).
  6. Someone who in the past 17 months never paused to consider the difference between campaigning and governance. He was very good at the former and lacks even the basic skills required for the latter.
  7. Someone who has driven an already divided nation further apart… to the point of breaking.
  8. Someone who foreign leaders of consequence have and are stating they find crass and devoid of intellect.

Should you take exception to my previous statements, then I suggest that you are a part of what brought on the death of this nation.

Three years ago, at a local state university, I taught a symposium entitled “Is Democracy Too Complicated for Stupid People.” Last Tuesday evening, I finally received confirmation of what I already knew… the answer in the case of this nation is a resounding YES.

Last Tuesday night we heard the dying gasp of an aging boorish nation. I have often said that “bowling is the sport of the great unwashed.” If so, then last Tuesday, America demonstrated that presidential politics is the now the “sport of the mindless.”

Since arriving in Michigan to teach a symposium and do this program I have already seen a typical Trump voter before I ever left the entrance drive to MBS - a rusting, smoking pick-up truck with a large decal on the back window: a map of the United States with the statement “No Thanks Emmigrants (yes with an “E”) No Vacancy.” On what was left of the rear bumper was a bright Trump 2016 sticker. One can only imagine how proud this individual’s parents and progeny must be.

If you find this polemic missive unsettling so be it. It is intended so.

If you actually voted for Trump, I would encourage you to go to https://my.uscis.gov/prep/test/civics. There you will find a sample test given to those seeking United States naturalization or citizenship. The sample test is directly from the United States government and the ability to answer these basic questions about our nation’s foundation is a requirement for American citizenship. I assure you, your candidate of choice cannot.

Donald Trump now needs a legal guardian. We provide those to individuals unable to make or communicate decisions about themselves and who are not particularly oriented to person, time, and place. We must be that guardian for Trump. Already the man who stated that he intended to “Drain this Swamp” has surrounded himself with relics of the same and now wallows with his corpulent abdomen in the very swamp he proclaimed to so loathe.

The Deplorable… and I intend that word… forgot to consider three essential things last Tuesday:

  1. Actual knowledge MATTERS.
  2. Actual competence MATTERS.
  3. Real (not feigned) compassion MATTERS.

Should you not subscribe to the three statements above, then it does not matter… you are not worth knowing.

Trite and hackneyed statements such as “it is time for us to come together and heal” or “the hallmark of America is the peaceful transition of power” no longer matter and are little more than mindless Pablum for the masses.

If you actually care about the future of this country then you realize that it is time to truly take back this nation. Take it from to soiled hands of the wealthy, take it from the hands of the unqualified and most of all return it to the masses who actually view politics as a part of the essential Constitution, not just something to do between watching episodes of My 600 Pound Life or playing video games.

Should you determine this article to be condescending then you are somewhat brighter than I thought.

President John Adams said after leaving office: “There never has been a Democracy which at some point in time did not commit suicide.” Last Tuesday, the United States of America committed suicide.

Opinions expressed here are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of Andy Rapp, Q-TV, Delta College, or PBS.


Currently Speaking host Andy Rapp

Veteran journalist Andy Rapp has been hosting Currently Speaking since 1999.

Each week, he's joined live in the studio by journalists, academics, and experts. Along with viewers at home, they tackle the local, national, and global issues that matter most.